Sunday, May 22, 2011

OK, I'm satisfied.

Today was rather monumental. As I mentioned before - the last time we had a 2nd beta on a Monday, I took a test the Sunday before and noticed the 2nd line had faded. It was still there, but significantly less so. I wasn't expecting today's test to go backwards at all, but I just needed wanted that extra bit of reassurance. So there you go...




I'm thinking the line's just not gonna get much darker at this point! I was planning to test again tomorrow, but I really think I am satisfied. People keep saying, "yes, a line is a line - you're pregnant." I know that - I never doubted the fact that it was positive. I just wanted to make sure it stayed that way. Hey, you signed up for crazy with me - I warned ya!

So, I'm starting to *try* to embrace the fact that I'm... pregnant. It's been awkward for me to say those words. Anyone I've told our news to I've said, "We got a positive test!" I haven't actually said, "I'm pregnant!" That just sounds presumptuous and weird. I think maybe I need to see it on the ultrasound screen before I can truly get what's going on inside my body right now! Infertiles often have trouble enjoying pregnancy... when it takes SO long to achieve it, after many failed attempts, it's hard to know what to think of it when it finally happens. You're overwhelmed with excitement, yet handicapped by a constant state of worry that you're going to lose it (again). So you feel a little awkward celebrating and being told "Congratulations!" It's just weird, that's all I can say. A good weird, but weird.

BUT, speaking of what is going on inside my body, I find these week-by-week pregnancy guides super fascinating. It is seriously wicked cool how FAST those microscopic embryos turn into little humans. Right now I'm 4 weeks + 3 days, so I'm in the middle of the 5th week...



If you are in your fifth week, you might not be able to stop yawning [tell me about it] long enough to read this! Sleeping in a jog bra can help the breast soreness [the estrogen pills kicked this one in early]. You may even feel a cramping or a full feeling in your uterus. Some women may also get headaches [YES - these come and go] from a rise in hormones . . .

Your baby's heart will begin to beat this week! It's amazing how much is happening so quickly. A transvaginal ultrasound will show about 90% of the yolk sacs. It is possible to differentiate between the head and the tail of your baby now. By the end of the week that folic acid will be paying off as the neural folds begin to fuse. Average length is 1.5 - 2.5 mm.


How crazy is that? A beating heart ALREADY? Wow. Well, tomorrow is beta #2 and I'm super excited to get those numbers so I can venture into a new realm of crazy... over-analyzing the rise in beta numbers. Ideally, they should double every 48-72 hours (the faster, the better). So if I'm doing the math right, I'm looking for something over 700. After tomorrow, we should have one more beta and then we'll do our first ultrasound sometime between the 6th and 7th week. Eeks!

Well, enjoy the rest of your weekend... I'll be back tomorrow with beta #s!


Above photo and text from about.com

13 comments:

Jill said...

Well said. I think I said "it looks like it worked" for, like, EVER. It's honestly THE thing I hate the most about infertility, the way it kills a lot of the joy that people who can get pregnant easily seem to have so naturally. It was a huge, huge, HUGE, battle for me both times (and will be again should the Lord allow), and I learned a lot along the way. That said, I needed people in my corner to come alongside and help me celebrate, almost force me to...so watch out girl, I'm that for you!! Now, go eat something loaded with sugar. You are PREGGO!

Melissa said...

So exciting! :D

I love the Baby Center weekly e-mails about what your baby is doing this week. It really is insane how much happens and how fast it all starts!

Still praying for a healthy pregnancy and doubling beta numbers for you!

Kelley said...

I can tell how hard this has been for you. I am cheering you on every step of the way. Don't worry, when I got pregnant I worried about every little thing. I wanted to go to the doctor, but I was also afraid every time I went. You've got an army cheering you on and supporting you and your dreams with prayer. Like Jill (up there) said, we'll help you celebrate each milestone! I'm with you girl! Look forward to those tweets every day (so you can take a million stick tests and I'll still follow)

Lori said...

SO happy to read this! :D

kLl said...

I am definitely PMSy right now but it was hard not to cry reading your post. I am just so happy for you!

Ally said...

SO happy!!!!

Susannah said...

Can.not.wait to hear!!! I am sooo stinkin' excited! And, I know you want/need that piece of mind-that is a normal human reaction. I think I tested several times before and after doctor's confirmations.

Julie Tiemann said...

I'm here - I signed up for the crazy and I'll take whatever you bring. Just now that even "fertiles" experience some form of neurosis when it comes to pregnancy, so you are in VERY good company right now. :) But I'll be praying not only for this baby (or babies!) to thrive, but also for you to be able to experience JOY throughout this experience. It is SUCH a miracle!!!

The Southern Lady said...

Good afternoon from Tokyo!

My heart is bursting at the seems for you! Though I've never commented before you have been in my prayers. I am so very happy for you. You'll continue to be in my thoughts as this new journey begins. Congratulations on such a marvelous blessing!

Warmly,

Elizabeth

Elizabeth said...

You're PREGNANT!!!! Yayyyyy! I am still so happy for you! I will continue to pray for you and your little one! Just think, next Mother's Day you will have your little one in your arms!

Happy Monday, mamma!
Blogging Blondie

Kiersten said...

Congratulations!! I am so happy and excited for you. And I actually just got a positive myself a few days ago and, weirdly, am exactly 4 weeks and 3 days too! We're not telling anyone until the end of the first trimester as my last attempt did not end well, but I look forward to following along with your pregnancy journey!

The Shabby Princess said...

This is just so exciting! I've been following you blog for some time and don't know have often I comment, if ever, but, I'm so thrilled for you.

Pretty Personal Gifts said...

Fabulous news!!!!! I am sending all sorts of good thoughts & wishes your way.